I miss my long hair today.

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Hello! I know i'm pretty slow announcing this here, but i kinda forgot i have a blog until i remembered shuk yee had a blog. This is what you happens when blogging becomes a chore!!!
Anyway, I am going to New Zealand to study. My parents totally did the application for University of Otago Foundation Year in secret since Nov/Dec'09 and they told me on 17 January'10. The whole family knew about it, even my pastor, before me!!! Ah well it shows my family are really good at keeping big secrets, so hmmmm at their other secrets.....

I'm leaving on 15 Feb'10, really soon. First i'm going grab all the angpows i can get (haha sorry Goh family and Lam family), buy a digital camera/dye my hair red. Then, I'm flying to Auckland to hang out with Uncle Danny, Aunt Lee Ngan and Toddler Isabelle (who looks like snoopy, sorry Goh family again). My dad wants Uncle Danny to counsel me, which i think it's stupid because i can stay in Singapore longer if i didn't need to have counselling (according to Dad)!!! And i'm on waitlist for SIA, if it doesn't come through then i have to take quantas which has a transit in Australia AND I DON'T LIKE TRANSITS!!! I'm highly aware i sound like spoilt brat, but i really like my butt to be on the same seat until i reach my destination. Then i'm flying to Dunedin to become a frozen popsicle, catch up with Judith, do my bank account, search for good and cheap motorbikes, explore the school and oh i don't know... harrass sheep.

I actually cried when my parents told me. Not because i'm happy or sad, but rather it was just this overwhelming feeling which i can't put my finger to. All i know is that this though ran through me: My parents really really really really really (x Infinity) love me. I know they do, but at that moment it suddenly hit me how much. They are taking this huge risk sending me there, leaving their hard-earned money in my hands and letting me start life anew! Do you know how hard it is sending your own flesh and blood away to some foreign country, only seeing her once a year? Do you know how hard it is giving away your hard-earned money to invest in the unforseen future, especially in the hands of a daughter who really loves screwing up and giving you heart attacks? No I don't. No you don't. But my parents do, which makes it even more hard to leave.

Yes i admit. I don't want to go not mainly because of my wonderful friends, the super exciting events YA has (YOG!!!), Singapore food or the familiarity of Singapore. But it's because of my parents. I'm worried that i will screw up again, break their hearts again and come back as a failure. I don't know how much they can take, and i am really really really scared of myself. I lose interest easily, and my motto is Fun First, Me Second, Others Last and Studies Way Way Way After Last. I definitely have to switch my motto, but it's just so difficult. Oh yeah and to add to my poor parent's grief, Nat is going away for 9 months to Australia. So it's just them in a empty terrace house. Pretty lonely and scary.

A very BIG sigh.

I guess after my parents, the people i would miss most would be my friends. The ever awesome Jovy, Kannapan, Esther, Adeline, Shuk Yee (gonna miss you even more), Julianne etc. You guys rock so much, and it will be painful to leave you all. Which is why i think i'm gonna escape and not tell you guys what time my flight is exactly. Emotional moments suck so bad and i don't want to leave with the memories of your sad faces in my mind. It's best if i just go quietly, and let you guys hate me for the sake of your happy faces imprinted in my memories. Shit i sound like i'm going away forever and ever hahahhaha but it feels like it.

Ahhh and i wanna see the Germans in April! Fabian's coming back, and i can't see my german friend! Oh and YOG + the uber cool interviews i will miss. I wish summer holidays were in August, but nooooo it has to be in December. But i bet i will still freeze in summer cos of the Antarctica winds blowing across the Dunedin lands.

Ok i'm stopping now! But i will blog really soon cos i need to resurrect this blog so that you all can hear about my life in NZ! Bye and see you when i see you!

First up,

Anyway i had the most AWESOME FANTASTIC STUPENDOUS CRAZY SHOCKING BIRTHDAY EVER!!!! I really love 23 November 2009 :))

The day started with me waking up late and cabbing down to school for CCA. I planned to go for a short while then leave BUT the teachers had to keep talking about German History. Then Liwei made Jul and I stay back and they gave us a birthday cake and cards!!! Thanks Liwei + YA <3333!

Later cabbed down to TP to meet Jovy for lunch. THAT WOMAN MADE ME SO SAD COS SHE DIDN'T WANT TO WISH ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY :( So i was sad and she just studied and i was bored. And then she left to celebrate Jul's birthday at Makansutra while i went for dinner with Joel and Jia Jun :)))

Joel and Jia Jun bought me flowers and i was soooo shocked. I love the sunflowers! Thanks guys! :) Later saw the Sims 3 World Adventures Game (AHHH BUY FOR CHRISTMAS) and bought earphones which were for 1 for 1 so awesome. Then had a lovely fish and co dinner treat and was eating a heeeelll lot. Thian Shin came over halfway and bought me chawanmushi! yay!

After dinner they bought that "Naughty G" Drink (disgusting) and Red Bull and we went up to the T1 rooftop. We talked, laughed and had fun, best birthday ever. Then i went home cos i was sooooo tired and scared daddy would scold.

So now here's the REALLY AMAZEBALLS PART:

I went home all sweaty and stuff and just pinned up my hair. I decided against sleeping cos i still wanted to talk to some people. Was talking to Fabian halfway when suddenly people started singing "HAAAPPY BIRTHDAAAAY TO YYOOOUUUU"! I turned around, really damn shocked and saw JOVY NG, JIA JUN, KANAPPAN AND DOMINIC IN MY BROTHER'S ONE HOLDING A BIRTHDAY CAKE. I WAS SO DAMN SURPRISED. Yeah i screamed oh gosh, and dominic was snapping unglam pics like crazy.

So now we know why Jovy was acting so mean earlier!!! Later had time talking to them and laughing about stuff. I made them eat chocolate ahaha, around 1230 i sent them to the bus stop.I feel really really really blessed and loved. THIS IS THE BEST BIRTHDAY EVER. Seriously it erases all the shit things i experienced this year!

Thank you Jovy, Jia Jun, Knp, Dom, Joel, Thian Shin, Li Wei, Julianne, Shuk Yee, Weng Keong, Titus, Tommy, YA and others who made this such a memorable birthday.

Jovy i really love you the max. Everytime i'm angry with you (which is like never) i will think of what you have done for me. LOVE <3

JJ, Joel and KNP thanks for sticking me after all these years. You guys are the best guy friends i have ever had and i really love you alll!!! :D

And thank you God for giving me such awesome friends who bring joy into my life, i'm really grateful to year.

So cheers to 17 years of age, and here's to more awesome birthdays to come!

I LOVE YOU ALL! <3

See you when i see you!

Pssst GERMANY IN ONE DAY, HAVEN'T PACK YET AHHH!

Yeah that's me :) Apparently Jovy found this in her computer, so she uploaded it on facebook! But i decided to share this awesomely cute picture(ahahahaha) with you guys :D

Anyway today i FINALLY saw my sec school friends!!! Jovy, Jia Jun, Joel, Julianne, Deon and Mark, I LOVE YOU GUYS ;D

I crashed TP after the cool trip to the Goethe Institute with YA (they were showing contrasting pictures of sights of East Germany 1991 against East Germany 2001/present, extremely awesome).

Julianne and I got stares as usual as we walked to tp becuase of our school uniforms, but thankfully no words of ___ ___ or ____ ____ so all's cool. Anyway it's been eons since i last saw Jovy, so i'm really happy today. We had fun laughing about random stuff, taking horrible unglam videos, playing the sausage game (haha) and much more! I love my sec school friends, i really do, they make me feel so contented/happy/crazy. I really love those sec 4 years whereby i could laugh like a hyena, tease people like mad, write my stories without fear of other people looking over my shoulder, and where i could just me plain old retarded Rachel Goh Su Theng! :D

It's not that my JC friends are bad, but it's nice to be with people who have stood by you for more than 2 years and who know you inside out :B I guess maybe in 2 years i will reach the same level of comfortableness with my JC friends? It's kinda hard to say because they are leaving me next year.... And i have always been a terrible friend to keep in contact with, i'm not sure if they like that or vice versa if it happens to me :/

All i can do is try and hope. But at least i know my sec sch friends + some of my JC friends will be the lovely people i have always known ;D (RANDOM BUT WTF?! WHY DO I HAVE ACS SONG PLAYING ON MY ITUNES! STUPID NAT!!!)

Anyway last friday, met Titus, Tommy, Weijia, Jiayi, Shanice, Clara and Kaymond. Wah lau eh all of them are attached (except kay), i felt kinda sad for myself, but happy for them haha. It was lovely meeting them and catching up on stuff.

Last saturday I had an awesome time talking to Alyssa. I never really talked to her before, so it's kind of a change to form a new friendship. I had a really cool time, and i went practically elated when she gave me her Archie Comics hahahaha. Thanks Aly :D

Ahhhh growl. I just realised my holidays is rather packed.

25 Nov - 3rd Dec : Berlin, Germany!!!

4 Dec: Overcome Jetlag

5 Dec - 8 Dec: Anglican Diocesan Youth Camp!!!

9 Dec: ACFF rehearsal?

10 Dec: ACFF!!! + after-party (please please parents let me go!)

11 Dec: Read Econs!!!

I don't know what the rest will bring but i'm sure i have something more :/

Oh yeah some German Updates :

I and some others will be doing an indian dance and shaking our ass.

We will be playing tchouk ball and handball against the super duper tall German people.

We can never EVER burp during meals (Jovy will die haha).

Weng Keong's gonna bring some shows for us to watch!!!

Esther and I are gonna go crazy sharing the same hotel room.

The Armano Hotel (which we are staying in) has FREE Wi-fi, and they allow us to borrow X-boxes and Ipods at the Hotel Counter. Although one thing that sucks like shit is that we have to bring our own soap, bloody hell.

Apparently in Germany, we have to enunciate our words properly for the Germans to understand our English.

And... there are quite a lot of Asians in Germany, so they may think we are native Germans and may speak to us in rapid German!!! Shit i'm soooo dead, but i will stick to Marcus "I-took-O-level-German" Yeo :)

I'm also pretty excited for the Youth Camp. Finally i can see how big the other churches are and i make new friends!!! I should be helping out in games, but Joshua haven't told me about it yet. It's getting really disturbing that we have no news yet. I seriously don't want to be thrown into the fray.

Ohhh, and school sucks. SAJC is like the only college to still hold lessons, and school ends on the 26th Nov. It's so stupid!!! Even more so for me! I go to school to take attendance ONLY, and later i just stone in the cafe like some loner reading a book/archie comics. Aaaaaargh, i think i'm not going to go to school, i need sleep grawr.

Tomorrow i'm going shopping(finaaaaally) for stuff, Wed and Fri is YA and Thurs is Alysia's day!

Shit, i need to pack for Germany. I really don't want to pack :( But oh weeeeeells.

I will update this blog once i get more interesting stuff!

Until then,

See you when I see you!!!

Sup!

My week's pretty boring i must say. School, Sleep, Com, Frown at strangers.... The usual.

I wanted to crash tp on wed but had YA. Then i wanted to crash tp on thursday but no one replied me. Grawr. I guess everyone's busy or ..... Sigh. I guess I asked for it.

Anyway, no new photos, thank God! My facebook will start exploding!!! But i think tmr (which will be an awesome day), there will be new pictures! I'm dreading yet excited about the thought....

Tomorrow is halloween and i'll be spending time with one of my favourite people in the world : Shuk Yee!

Adeline has her parties to attend, Tiffany has church, Yuan Zhen i'm not sure. So it's just me, Shuk Yee and her friend, Johannes (who flew in for Australia just for this weekend, i wish i could do that!!!) Hmmm, I've an idea of what we are gonna do, but i shall not say it ;)

Anyway just had a flu vaccination injection because of Germany. I love injections so it was pretty cool. I love the scared feeling I get when i see the doctor preparing the instruments and showing me the needle. Then i love the part my muscles get all bunched up then just relax and then the sharp short pain which was really nothing at all. Huh, i sound really disturbed. But, please don't think i've gone all cuckoo on you ;D

The doctor was really funny after that, she was like "If you tell me you are coughing, i will just strangle you". And in with her old frail hands and her fake angry face, she imitated the strangled moments in the air. It just made me realise why i wanted to take medicine at first, i wanted to be the fun doctor everyone loved and appreciated. But i guess it's not in God's plans anymore, oh well..... God has better plans for me :)

Hmmm, Chinese A-levels on monday. I haven't touched any chinese books, i just don't want to cos' chinese sucks. But i know if i fail i have to take it again next year. If i pass, i can point the middle finger at Chinese Language and bid Au Revoir. SO I REALLY HOPE I CAN PASS. Which means i have to study, shit.

And i screwed up OP today. I just lost my confidence, i freezed up like a popsicle. And my voice just went monotone argh i hate it when i lose it. But thanks to my group mates for their support, they are awesome really. I must must must get back my confidence for OP!!!

Oh yeah i just realised when i get back from Germany on 3rd dec, i have one dya to get over my jet lag, then i'm off to youth camp in JB. Wow i wonder how i'll handle that. I think i'd just collapse on my group mates!

Anyway i'm off to search the house for black pantyhose. I need it for tomorrow. Then i need to check through my stuff to see if it's all in order....

Argh LAST chinese tuition tmr, i can do this i can do this i can do this.
Bye. See you when i see you! :)

Have an awesome weekend!

P/s: I'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch. I just seem so agitated nowadays, i'm really sorry.

Sigh, it really feels like i'm spinning around in circles with no way of stopping.